I'm one of those people constantly itching for something more.
It's kinda bad. Here I am with an amazing family, fun friends, a nice home, a nourishing religion, a good education etc. etc. Oh, and pretty much a perfect relationship. Yet for me it's beyond that, disregarding those people and things in my life as I take a magnifying glass to me, Katherine Elizabeth, and interrogate myself with questions like, "What will people think about you when you're dead?"
It's at times when my brain's all twisted up like this that I breach out with my creativity and wonder what more I can do. I want to be important, remembered, an interesting subject matter when {or rather, IF} people were to bring me up in the future.
Maybe it's me getting too awe-struck when I see people not all that much older than myself with their picture splattered on the front page. Or too romanticist when I watch movies/read books chalk full of bravery, world-changing, and rain kisses. Not like I want all my secrets stripped from me and tossed to the public, or to be mixed up in a life-or-death situation perfect for the cinemas.
When considering what I can do with myself I think about how I like to sing, to write, to sketch, to make people feel good. {Perhaps unimportantly I also enjoy traveling, photography, learning facts about the human body and mind, pondering about the world's unsolved mysteries and embracing concepts other people might think strange, kissing, rolling down the windows with my arms out the window and the base down low, and daydreaming.} What do I do with these hobbies? My dream since I was seven years old has been to publish novels; I would love the talent to be able to entertain people with my singing. Would these satisfy my desire? I also wish more than anything to be someone's hero.
This has gotten me stumped. But mark my words-- I don't care if there are billions of others to seize up all the opportunities in the world, I am going to make this life worth something. Even if it's only 5¢.
It's kinda bad. Here I am with an amazing family, fun friends, a nice home, a nourishing religion, a good education etc. etc. Oh, and pretty much a perfect relationship. Yet for me it's beyond that, disregarding those people and things in my life as I take a magnifying glass to me, Katherine Elizabeth, and interrogate myself with questions like, "What will people think about you when you're dead?"
It's at times when my brain's all twisted up like this that I breach out with my creativity and wonder what more I can do. I want to be important, remembered, an interesting subject matter when {or rather, IF} people were to bring me up in the future.
Maybe it's me getting too awe-struck when I see people not all that much older than myself with their picture splattered on the front page. Or too romanticist when I watch movies/read books chalk full of bravery, world-changing, and rain kisses. Not like I want all my secrets stripped from me and tossed to the public, or to be mixed up in a life-or-death situation perfect for the cinemas.
When considering what I can do with myself I think about how I like to sing, to write, to sketch, to make people feel good. {Perhaps unimportantly I also enjoy traveling, photography, learning facts about the human body and mind, pondering about the world's unsolved mysteries and embracing concepts other people might think strange, kissing, rolling down the windows with my arms out the window and the base down low, and daydreaming.} What do I do with these hobbies? My dream since I was seven years old has been to publish novels; I would love the talent to be able to entertain people with my singing. Would these satisfy my desire? I also wish more than anything to be someone's hero.
This has gotten me stumped. But mark my words-- I don't care if there are billions of others to seize up all the opportunities in the world, I am going to make this life worth something. Even if it's only 5¢.
