Time is a strange thing.  Splayed out, never ending in either direction,  and slippery like ice in your fingers.  The present clings to reality for a split second before moving on, leaving the just-current moment but a memory.
  If I ground my foot and snatch a hold of the present, my life presents inself as that of a sixteen-year-old girl halfway done with high school, at that point where the world is fascinating and terrifying all at the same time. If I glance behind my shoulder, I am ensnared by exciting memories of an adventures of being small.
  But then my eyes flutter shut and I visualize that which does not exist yet.
  The future.  The new horizons.
  I imagine submersion in whole new cultures.  With a battered passport and small bag and just enough money, I want to ditch my comfort zone in order to explore the world.  It has so much more to it than Little Hometown with its Familiar People and Culture; to die snuggled up in the same old place that offered a birthplace and living space would be a slap in the face to the all the wonders of the earth.  I want to reach out and finger the unfamiliar lifestyle that other souls are familiar with, to gain a respect and understanding developed by empathy of experience.  I want my eyes to behold the the beauty of God's creations.
  I imagine billowing white skirts and cascading curls and the taste of warm lips as my heart pulses with pure ecstacy.  Like a young girl dreaming of fairy tales, I want the glory of a temple marriage, locking my hands in his like our eternal fates but knowing for certain that this Happily Ever After is for real.   So lovely would be a small wedding on the coast with a reception of close friends and family joining us on the beach for fine sand between our toes and a salty breeze and the crash of waves echoing on the shore as we dance.  And then an escape, just the two of us, as we douse ourselves in the joy of True Love.
   I imagine fabricating masterpieces.  With my writing and my artwork and my music, I want to blow the kisses of my mind's ideas to the world around me and see if I can nuzzle myself into a little teeny-tiny corner of the earth's Wall of Significance and Remembrance.  If I can find that spark of ultimate creativeness, there are no limits to what can be developed by simply my brain and either a keyboard, a paintbrush, or my voice.  
   I imagine a swollen belly and the realization that inside of me, a new Person is curled up, waiting to emerge into the golden sunlight.  The thought of creating another human being, half of my own self even, dazzles me.  I wish to be that mother whom her children cling to.  Living in a small home of the East Coast of the U.S., I want my little family to be saturated in memories of holiday traditions and four seasons and bedtime stories and Family Home Evenings that are so fun, the kids wish it wasn't just on Mondays.  I hope to nudge souls into a dark world as beacons of light, knights armed and protected by the knowlege that I've helped them discover.
  I imagine.  The clock ticks.  And I enjoy the moments as they bloom.